The Alpha’s Fated Outcast: Rise Of The Moonsinger

189 The truth of her birth Ill Miriam .

Its been two weeks since | cback to the Moon Temple with an empty womb and a heart heavier than Id ever

known .

The stillness of the temple at all times which used to groundin such a way | couldnt understand , broken

occasionally only by the soft rustling of robes or the distant chant of prayers had now beca prison to.

| was the secret, trapped in a prison and the only people who knew were my wet pillow each night and my

conscience .

| couldnt believe | was a mom well a half mom actually but that experience changed my life in ways | never

expected .

Each day felt heavier than the last my belly was still round and protruded .

| was still too tired from carrying another human for nine months and still forced to get on with my life like

nothing just happened .

Of course , no one noticed since | returned in Spring and we were always at our busiest at this tof the year

because a lot of special flowers , herbs and seeds are found at this t.

| simply went out of my way and kept myself away from unnecessary interactions .

Except for Terra my bosom friend , Mother Liora and the other priestesses who were Mother Lioras closest friends

no one else knew .

For instance , at the morning Assembly today when | was asked to lead the e prayers , had recited a ritual prayer

instead of the prayers designed to kickstart our day .

Superior Priestess Dianas eyes had narrowed onas she assessedfrom head to toe .

Miriam , she called out coldly .

You look ... different .

Sluggish in your movements , forgetful and fat .

Is there something you wish to share ? My breath caught in my throat , my heart pounding in panic as | tugged

at my uniform , stretching the already stretched fabric .

The pregnancy had madeadd a lot of weight on my hips and chest .

Although the midwife had prepared a special routine forto follow to lose the baby fat, she had toldit was

a gradual process .

Everyone was staring atin the hall , especially Jemimah who had a smirk on her face .

Miriam ? she called out impatiently again .

15 189 The truth of her birth Im sorry , Mother ! | muttered .

| didnt ask for an apology , she responded , her voice was filled with frustration .

T simply want an explanation as to why youre looking out of place from all the girls in the temple .

Your uniform is too tight , your face is round and are those dark circles | see around your your eyes ? | opened

my mouth , looking for an explanation but no words cout .

Before the silence could becsuspicious , Mother Liora intervened .

The little self discovery trip | sent her on must have been harder on her than | thought , she said givinga

reassuring glance .

Its not uncommon for children to go outside this pack and cback looking the s.

Think of all the overly processed food and all ... Mother Liora said .

There was a murmur of agreement and the conversation turned to something else but | felt Priestess Diana still

looking at.

At night, | lay on my bed staring at the ceiling .

My baby wasnt insideanymore , but my body hadnt accepted that truth yet .

My belly was still soft and rounded and my muscles still ached with the strain of carrying a child that was no

longer there .

| turned onto my side , clutching my blanket tightly and cried myself to sleep .

In the days that followed , | was living in hell .

Mornings were the cruellest .

| would wake up and my hands would instinctively move to cradle the bump that was no longer there .

Most times when | bend to pick something up .

| would catch myself dropping to my knees first just like how it had done when | was still pregnant .

My breasts were still swollen painfully and hard as stone and still leaking milk .

Despite all the herbs the midwife had givento stop it, it still rushed out .

Every morning , | would pad my breast with several clothes to hide the milk stain and for the entire day , | would

be conscious of myself .

Most times , the pain would be unbearable and | would have to sneak back to my room and nurse my swollen

breasts .

| becan expert at hiding my tears and my pain .

| would excuse myself under the pretence of needing solitude for prayer, only to sit in the corner of my small

room , rocking myself and sobbing into my hands .

The contractions were the worst .

In between carrying out my duties , my womb would squeeze in pain and | would gnash my teeth , clamping

down on it waiting for the moment to pass .

By the second month , | started hearing baby cries .

25 C 189 The truth of her birth !!! 10 when the sound of a crying baby filled my ears .

It was filled with desperation and judgment .

| stumbled out of my room , searching the hall for the source .

Instead , | met Priestess Tania .

Miriam ! she held my hand ; she must have seen the wild desperation in them .

Whats wrong with you dear ? Its after lights out .

What are you doing walking about ? My baby ! | murmured , trying to move away from her hold .

Shes crying , | need to get to her.

Oh, Moon, Priestess Tania exhaled , looking sideways to make sure there was no one in the hallway but us .

She draggedto my room and a moment later , she cback with Mother Liora and Priestess Khaliah .

Both women tried to calm my racing heart and the endless cries that were ringing in my ears until | eventually

drifted into sleep .

When | woke the next morning , | saw Mother Liora sitting at the edge of my bed , staring at.

Mother ! | murmured pushing myself up .

How do you feel ? she asked, touching my forehead .

Im fine ! | nodded giving her a puzzled expression .

What are you doing here ? She avoided my gaze .

| know youre suffering Miriam , and you feel guilty but if you keep this up , everything will be exposed .

Theres a limit to the excuses | can give for you .

Everyone has noticed that something is not right and | would like for it not to go beyond that ? | drew my knees

under my chin .

What did | do again , mother ? You were roaming the hallway last night looking for your baby .

Thankfully , it was priestess Tania who saw you .

Are you taking the medications the midwife recommended ? | nodded hanging my head .

You must try , Miriam .

Im sorry that | cannot understand how it is with you but you have duties that are suffering .

Youve been distracted for too long and Im not sure how long we can hide it .

Its the second month already ... please , Miriam ... | lowered my gaze , Im sorry , Mother .

Ill do better .

Mother Liora reached out, placing a hand on my trembling fingers .

Youve been through a great deal , child .

I understand that .

But you must find strength from within and move on .

Were the light in the darkness for our people .

You cannot carry this 180 The truth of her birth Ill | nodded silently .

But the cries didnt stop there .

It happened again the next night and

the next and at randornyimes bling

[

the daylsut) Mart to live with it . The

content is on novelenglish.net! Read

the latest chapter there!

By the third month , guilt becmy constant companion .

| would wake up in the middle of the night and stroll into the woods , surrounding the temple .

There , under the stars, | would fall to my knees and weep .

| kept seeing my baby in my dreams .

Tiny hand reaching out for me, crying fornot to let go .

Every night, the sscene played out again and again .

The scene where the midwife would pick the baby from the bassand leave the room .

Then the other scene where | had held her and felt her little heartbeat against mine .

And how she had immediately stopped crying when | held her, cooing softly .

The guilt was suffocating .

How could | have abandoned my

child ? How could | live with myself ,

knowing had ghos¥n(dly over

mother & ? A few nights later, |

returned to the temple after one of

my midnights walk . The content is

on novelenglish.net! Read the latest

chapter there!

My robes were damp from the morning dew and my cheeks had dried off with tears .

| found myself standing in front of

the Moon Altar, Rg

Ni the oridsfRd es performed

their most important rituals . The

content is on novelenglish.net! Read

the latest chapter there!

The moonlight streamed through the little hole above the roof.

| sank to my knees , my hands clasped tightly in prayer .

Moon Goddess , | whispered with a trembling voice .

I have failed .

| have failed you , my child and myself .

| dont know how to carry this pain anymore .

| bowed my head in grief , crying out all the pain | felt inside .

When no answer came, | rose slowly , my legs shaking beneath.

For the first tin my life , the Moon Temple felt like a prison .

That was when | knew | couldnt stay .